Nobody Gonna Break Our Stride.
It's a complicated family
My grandmother died tonight.
My family is strange -- my mother's the oldest of three, but has been the outcast for awhile. Mostly because my parents divorced about 20 years ago. That was not acceptable to my grandparents or my mother's siblings, especially my aunt. (My relationship with my father is strange, too. I haven't talked to him since kicking him out of the procession at my sister's wedding (she didn't want him there) in 2005. And even then, I didn't talk to him. Or at the reception afterward. He steered clear of me, and I had no desire to speak to him.)
During my parent's divorce, I remember my aunt telling me and my siblings that "it's always the children who suffer" in divorce. Divorce, like I said, was not acceptable. But separation ... my grandparents hadn't lived together for at least 15 years. She lived in Jamesport, Mo.; he lived in Harlingen, Texas.
It's a complicated family. It got a little more complicated when, about three or four years ago, my grandparents got divorced. One of the reasons was to simply wills. See? We're all freakin' crazy. Anyway, that next Christmas I sympathetically told my aunt that "it's always the children who suffer" in divorce. I'm not sure she caught on.
But back to the point. My mother's siblings, who live within 15 miles away from my grandmother, didn't call anyone in our family (my mother's about 3 hours away in Missouri, my sister and I are another 2 hours and my brother's in D.C.) to tell us our grandmother had died. They left that to my grandfather -- who lives in Texas -- to call my mother.
Seriously, we're all crazy. I'm sure the next week will be full of craziness.
Of course, I had intended to call my grandmother today, and didn't. I wouldn't have been able to get ahold of her; my uncle took her to the hospital last night and she died sometime earlier today. Still.
My family is strange -- my mother's the oldest of three, but has been the outcast for awhile. Mostly because my parents divorced about 20 years ago. That was not acceptable to my grandparents or my mother's siblings, especially my aunt. (My relationship with my father is strange, too. I haven't talked to him since kicking him out of the procession at my sister's wedding (she didn't want him there) in 2005. And even then, I didn't talk to him. Or at the reception afterward. He steered clear of me, and I had no desire to speak to him.)
During my parent's divorce, I remember my aunt telling me and my siblings that "it's always the children who suffer" in divorce. Divorce, like I said, was not acceptable. But separation ... my grandparents hadn't lived together for at least 15 years. She lived in Jamesport, Mo.; he lived in Harlingen, Texas.
It's a complicated family. It got a little more complicated when, about three or four years ago, my grandparents got divorced. One of the reasons was to simply wills. See? We're all freakin' crazy. Anyway, that next Christmas I sympathetically told my aunt that "it's always the children who suffer" in divorce. I'm not sure she caught on.
But back to the point. My mother's siblings, who live within 15 miles away from my grandmother, didn't call anyone in our family (my mother's about 3 hours away in Missouri, my sister and I are another 2 hours and my brother's in D.C.) to tell us our grandmother had died. They left that to my grandfather -- who lives in Texas -- to call my mother.
Seriously, we're all crazy. I'm sure the next week will be full of craziness.
Of course, I had intended to call my grandmother today, and didn't. I wouldn't have been able to get ahold of her; my uncle took her to the hospital last night and she died sometime earlier today. Still.
Tags: family
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