What's the *worst* thing about being over 30?

[Doodaddy]

Totally copying Darlene's idea here...

Anyway, for me, it's definitely the feeling that if I screw something up I can't just "try something else next year." I've had 4 or 5 careers already, which of course means I've done exactly 0 career advancement. (I'm a SAHD now, yay! Best boss ever!)

Anyway, I'm starting to realize that an entirely fresh college degree is probably out of the question, that my chances of doing anything entirely different get smaller every year.

And you guys?

[Doodaddy]

That reminds me of something I just thought of the other day -- about how what used to seem kitschy is now just "lame"... I went to a party in my 20s where all the guys had grown mustaches, they were playing Hall & Oates and serving Manhattans. It was kind of, y'know, retro cool. Today, it would just seem unbearably "old."

[Maria]

It could be because I'm just ultra dorky, but
1. if I don't know something, I'm cool with confessing. I know a bunch of stuff, some of it is actually important and relevant, even, but no one knows it all. When a 20-something tries to pass off their ignorance as cute, I'm not buying it. I just think they're too insecure to admit what they don't know.
2. I look at 20 somethings now, and I don't think they're cooler. Even the ones that think they are. And when I examine why I think someone's cool, it's inevitably because they seem to be embracing themselves, which is cool at any age.
3. The Hall & Oates party sounded fun. Even today.

And, I like guys that are my age or older. I like a man who has been a man for a while. I want to be with other people who are complicated, and have experienced some trials and tribulations, and know they won't fall apart just because of a rough patch. I like men who have stepped up to the plate, even if it means they have kids and other obligations. I like men that have had to balance their wants and needs with those of other people in their life.

[Sarcomical]

i'd have to agree with you, Doodaddy. it's hard to maintain the optimism of "anything's possible" when you start thinking "oh, crap, i'll be 40 any day now." and you know what's right after that, right? FIFTY. it's a mental challenge not to let yourself go there.

and honestly, i am also hating the fact that it takes a lot more work to look NOT tired. *sigh*

[Aidan]

I also hate that you start developing raised ridges along your spine and your toes start fusing together into a kind of hoof.

Or is that just me?

[Vanessa]

I can relate to that Charlotte. I'd really like to open my own business, but I think what if it fails? I could have spent that time working at a larger company and building my retirement account instead of draining it. In my 20ies I was so fearless, after a few strokes of bad luck, I'm much more cautious.

[Horny Housewife]

I just recently realized I spent my twenties concentrating on who I wanted to be, and I've so far spent my thirities concentrating on what I want to accumulate (house, baby, husband, money, blah blah blah...).

For me, blogging has been a way to reconnect with my inner-self. It's helped me think about what I want for myself and who I want to work on becoming. And, most surprisingly, it's helped me connect with others on a intellectual and spiritual level.

I love the friends I've made so far in my thirties, the friends I made because we worked together or had children the same age. But there is also something so special about the online friends I'm making because we are reading each other and have a similar senses of humor or life perspectives. We're connecting because of who we are, not what we have.

[The Dudes Dad]

Doodaddy I an a SAHD myself and I too have been through the gambit on the employment front. A couple of weeks ago I started looking for work and have put out about 40 resumes. The problem is finding something in my field of expertise which would be managing people and call centers but everyone wants additional expertise that I just don't have. I have been through 5 careers now and I think I would rather carve my own eyes out over starting from the bottom yet again.

[Doodaddy]

I know what you mean! I see old friends of mine moving up career ladders and getting all sorts of respect... it can be frustrating.

On the other hand, sometimes I just feel happy to be out of the rat race, even though my own version was the non-profit, animal-welfare and education rat race. It's still a race.

[The Dudes Dad]

I had some of those opportunities but I saw the sacrifices I would have to make. Sacrifices being the long hours away from family. Sacrificing my own perceptions of right and wrong versus the corporate version. In the end I always found myself at odds with the company as far as how they wanted me to treat my employees which became very stressful trying to find some sort of balance between furthering my career and being able to look myself in the mirror. While we live paycheck to paycheck I am happier now then I was when I was making close to six figures. Part of that is definitely the companies I was working for and some of is just the nature of business these days and yet another part being my own fault for having an overdeveloped sense of right and wrong.

[Maria]

Is it possible to have an overdeveloped sense of right and wrong in a world where basic food, clothing, and shelter (much less healthcare) are NOT considered basic human rights? Where we are urged to purchase items from China, crafted by children, because the ability to work and make money is more vital to their family's welfare than their education? Yeah, sweatshops are okay, because it's so much better than what they had before.

My opinion is that far too many of us lack any sense of right and wrong. Cash is King!

[Sandra Fernandez]

For me it's the expectation others have that I should have become more subdued, less... dramatic, I guess. My sister says that I never grew up. Which means that I don't react to things with her sense of propriety or seriousness. And yet, I have a great career (nearly 15 years in the same field), am respected in my job, have solid friendships and am known as the "go-to gal" -- I get things done. I just don't take personal things as seriously as my family and many of my friends do.

The other is the personal feeling that I have not lived the life I intended to have. I am not disappointed, but do have curiosity about the "what ifs."

[notofthisworld_1973]

Something always seems to be hurting